The Best Present Ever?

The running joke last week was based on the "Dick in a Box" ("DIAB") video Justin Timberlake and Adam Samberg did on Saturday Night Live a couple weeks ago. If you haven't seen it, click above and watch it before you read any further. I'll wait.

Okay, so all my friends have decided to tell me they hate my new job because I'm always working and have been pretty much on radio silence for the last month, other than very set, scheduled plans. It's very unlike me, but my point of view is this: It's getting me ready for when I have to become a hermit when school starts January 24th. Moving on. Tuesday I get some ims from Agie telling me they are drinking (and have been since 1 pm) and that I need to come out and join them. From about 5:30 to 8:30 I got ims from Tim, Bob, Herb and Agie telling me to come over and keeping me entertained by asking questions like "Guess what Tim got me for Christmas? It came in a box." to which my reply was "You should give him your box in a box." My mom would be so proud. Anyways, the joke kept coming up so that when I got to their house there was talk of actually doing Step 1: You cut a hole in the box. It didn't end up happening that night but there was a lot of drinking by everyone but me (my year of good decisions apparently started early, although given last Friday night, it may not have stuck - thank goodness for dry runs...no pun intended). Bob and I went to bed around 11:30 because we needed to get up at 7 for him to drive me to the metro. It would have been a great plan except for the shots. It was really warm in the guest room. He was really drunk and naked. Which was a problem really only when he decided to walk around the house while everyone was still up giving me no option but to text Agie saying "We are not having sex. We are not even making out. Please let that be known even though he is walking around naked." He put the moves on me (not unexpected given our brief, but semi-sordid history), I said "not when you're this drunk and not in Agie and Tim's house" and he proceeded to throw up the rest of the night. Now, I'm not saying he was sick with rejection, I'm just pointing out more good decision making on my part (again, reference the Social D/Bouncing Souls posts about how I need to avoid crushing on this guy) and a miserable night of sleep for both of us. He got me to the metro barely in time and apologized for his behavior. No biggee from my point of view, plus I had to get to work.

Flash forward to Debby and me in HiTimes Sunday. At one point I asked her "What do you want to get? Other than a piece of Todd of course." Which started us giggling. She then revealed she had DIAB stuck in her head which caused us to giggle even more (again, we're 12, we admit it). So Todd comes back with some recommendations for wine and asks if that was us giggling he heard way back in the storeroom. It was and I then felt obligated to tell him what was so damn funny. He had not seen the video so I made him promise he would YouTube it when he got a chance. I"m confident he'll be thankful. Our next errand involved getting her mother a gift certificate and since I was in desperate need of one, getting me a manicure. I noticed I had a missed call from Agie so I called her back and found out from Bob, who answered the phone, that Tim had called my number and handed the phone to Bob telling him he had a call. After Bob apologized to me again for the other night, and I again told him he really had nothing to apologize for, and then he apologized again, I got Agie on the phone and told her how we had the song stuck in our head. She thought it was due to the pictures she had sent which showed steps one (cut a hole in the box) and two (put your junk in the box) which had been done at the Christmas Eve dinner they were having. I gotta tell you, the pics are priceless but I shall hold onto them for potential blackmail purposes in case I need another early ride to the metro.

The rest of the night I was getting texts from Agie's phone saying things like "Are you ready for step 3?" (That's where you make her open the box....) It got to the point I had to tell Bob to start using his phone just so I could kinda keep track of who was texting me. It was highly entertaining especially since I didn't get the pictures until I woke up Christmas morning. There is much, much more to the story, but I shall protect the box givers at this point. If New Year's finds us all together I can only imagine the trouble we're going to get in.