California Love

'Cali is where they put they mack down'

By default and due to sheer exhaustion on my part in addition to being the title of this post, that is now the song of the day. Thank you Tupac.

I went home this weekend to visit a very few friends and see babies (oh goodness they were cute). It was a quick trip but probably my favorite one I've taken since moving here almost four years ago. It was relaxing and fun and the first time I've not been ready to leave and come back to DC. Calm down Debby, that does not mean I'm moving back.

Friday Debby picked me up at LAX in her convertible and we cruised down to Venice and had yummy Mexican food and margaritas on a patio. Then we ran a couple errands, including her buying a new 27" TV. I'm convinced the moving and installation of this new TV was a not so subtle attempt by Debby to make me think she can't possibly be okay not living with me anymore. It almost worked when she sprayed the cleanser into the cable box to dust it. We watched a movie and took a nap (as is our pattern whenever we visit each other, dating back to when we would have 'cave day' at our house and watch movies all afternoon) then headed out to drinks with her friend Paul and his roommate (name is escaping me so we shall call her Kathy) Kathy. We started at this neat little eclectic bar/cafe and then headed over to Barney's Beanery on 3rd Street. That's where the trouble began.

Debby and I had joked about what the plan would be if we got separated. I kabashed the talk because it was supposed to be a quiet night since we had to get up early the next day. I really should know better than to curse myself that way. We get to Barney's and during the course of the next couple hours about eight to ten men come up and make friends with us (mostly Debby - she's way cuter and I was more interested in baseball than the boys). I ended up spending a lot of time talking to a young man (26ish) named Scott whose friend James (also 26ish) was quite taken with Debby. James was a sweet guy, very nice, funny, smart. Totally not Debby's type physically. He isn't an unattractive man, but he's a software engineer - I'll just leave it at that. We all do the exchange cards bit and most everyone leaves. Scott left with Debby and I and walked us (well, me, Debby was way ahead of us) home.

We all went up to the apartment, Debby went straight to bed and Scott and I hung out for a little while. Next thing I know I'm waking up around 7:30 and see a note on the coffee table by my head. Let me make it clear I was alone and fully clothed. Here's the note:



Such a sweet boy. After I stopped chuckling I read it to Debby who joined me in wondering where he got the paper. After she finished giving me grief I checked my blackberry and found this from her suitor:

"Subject: So yes, I'm skeptical :)

Plan B,
So yes, I'm writing right after I got home because on the skeptic scale of if Debby is going to call my # I'm about 90%. I hope you had fun with Scott, though at the time of writing it remains to be seen how much fun...heh.

Anyways, if you put in a good word for me that's great. I know Debby is not the forceful type and that's ok. And its ok that she's 30 something or whatever (doesn't matter). What really matters is that I know she has a brain w/ intellect and a job that she loves.

I hope all is well.

-- James (from Barney's in Santa Monica) :)"

Thank God she has a brain with intellect and isn't "the forceful type". What does that even mean? Young boys are so sweet and cute when they are sincere.

Screaming Mimis

What kind of person lets their kids run around LAX at 10 pm screaming in what can only be described as a high pitched squeal? Bad parents, that's who.  I hope they are not on my plane. Although if they are on my flight I suppose I will be grateful they were being unruly hellions in a big terminal rather than a small plane for 6 hours with no hope of escape. There is always a silver lining.

So This Is The South

One of the things I do before any flight is have a Bloody Mary, unless I am traveling for work and then I have 2 (just kidding). It was too early to have one at National so I decided to partake in my ritual during my brief stopover in Charlotte. It's a damn good Bloody, but man the atmosphere is making me work to enjoy it.  The bar is smoky and filled with what look to be rabid NASCAR fans on their way to a fishin' trip with the good ole boys. I don't know that I've ever been more aware of the fact I have breasts than I am now. Thank God I said yes to the dollar more extra shot!

Code Orange Travel

About the only complaint I have is that they made me take my flippers off to walk through security (which was this odd chamber type thing that blows air on you). Oh and they didn't announce that we couldn't take onto the plane any beverages we had purchased after going through security until about 5 minutes to boarding. More warning would have been nice. All in all a fairly pleasant trip so far even though we haven't left the gate yet.

Befuddled Bothered and Bewildered Am I

I'm flying home tomorrow and decided it would be in my best interest to find out what I can and cannot have in my carry-on so as to avoid any unpleasantness at the gate tomorrow, because believe you me I would throw down before throwing out my lip gloss.

The link above will take you to the official TSA website but here are some highlights:

Aerosol spray bottles and cans No (Makes sense. Off to a good start.)

All creams and lotions including Neosporin or first-aid creams and ointments, topical or rash creams and ointments, suntan lotions, moisturizers, etc. No (Argh. I get dehydrated when I fly and like to keep moisturized. So much for the hand lotion.)

Cigar Cutters Yes (Really? Okay I guess.)

Corkscrews Yes (For all the toasting to the feeling of safety instilled by not allowing hand lotion on the plane? I could use it to stab someone if they try to nab my lip gloss though.)

Cuticle Cutters Yes (Another sharp object. Awesome.)

Gel-filled Bras Yes (At least we'll have good cleavage to distract from our dry, withered, unlotioned hands.)

Knitting and Crochet Needles Yes (Rad. The sharp objects keep coming.)

Lip gels such as Carmex or Blistex; Liquid lip glosses or other liquids for lips No (Now not even my mouth can be moisturized. Grr.)

Liquid sanitizers No (Sweet. I'm totally picking up a cold on my trip.)

Nail Files Yes (And the sharp objects keep coming.)

Personal lubricants - Up to 4 oz. Yes (Insert mile-high club joke here, ie 'See? Parts of you can be moisturized.')

Safety Razors - including disposable razors. Yes (What reasoning did these people use? Seriously.)

Toy Transformer Robots Yes (Don't they know they're more than meets the eye?)


Before you get all up in my grill, let me say I get that due to recent happenings there needed to be changes in what can and cannot be in a carry on and I am more than okay with it. I would much rather be inconvenienced for a bit and arrive safely than be on a flight that had something harmful on it. But could you make the new regulations make a bit more sense please? How is it okay to bring on RAZORS but not Carmex??!?!??

CA Terminology of the Month

In honor of my upcoming trip home I have decided to bring back the phrase "macking".  As in "I can't believe they were macking in front of everyone". Use it well, use it wisely, just make sure to use it.

Booze and Strangers - A Classic Combination

Friday after our staff lunch Courtney and I headed out to find a fun happy hour. Local 16 wasn't open yet, neither was Bar Pilar so we ended up at Saint-Ex, or rather the location at which The Night Of Which We (Katie and I) Never Speak occurred. It was daylight and we stayed upstairs so I figured I would be safe. And I was. James met us out and we headed over to Bar Pilar. More friends met up with us, a couple of each of our friends and it turned into a really fun evening.

So one of James' friends was getting ready to leave and I gave her my card since we had a really nice time talking with each other (she won me over when she kept telling me how great my hair is lol). A couple minutes later she and her boyfriend reappeared and she asked "do you know anyone in Marblehead?". I told her that my brother and sister-in-law live there. Turns out she knows my SIL. Random. She was invited to the wedding, which was beautiful, but was unable to attend and has since lost touch. So I got SIL on the horn and they chatted enough to trade info. See? Boozing with strangers can be good! Just not on TNOWWSNS.

Sissy Move

I was all for intentionally walking Bonds for the rest of his career so that he wouldn't get any more home runs and set a new record. The guy is a complete asshat who plays the game for fame and money not (to quote the title of a Kevin Costner movie) for love of the game (my 2nd favorite of his movies btw). In any other circumstance I think it is a sissy move.

I'm home watching the Boston/Anaheim game (go Angels) and Snyder (Sox pitcher) just did it. Granted they are coming off losing 5 straight at home to the Yankees which hurts anyone except a Yankees fan.  Even given that, sac up and pitch and don't hide behind "strategy". 

And now I'm paying for popping off. Sox have bases loaded with no outs. Argh.

"I Asked You to go to a Green Day Concert

You said you never heard of them. How cool is that?"

Even though my day started with basically being sexually assaulted on the bus (Mr. Man just could not keep his crotch from rubbing against my shoulder. Then when I stood up he kept touching my ass.) this song snapped me out of my funk and has turned the day around.

El Scorcho - Weezer

Song of the Half Day

We have our staff lunch today at Lauriol Plaza so we only have to work until noon. Woo Hoo! iTunes is on Party Shuffle for the occasion and I found myself singing aloud to this song in my office (which I rarely do).

Heard the World - O.A.R.

Not exactly an uplifting party song but the chorus is catchy as all gets.

Hair Today, Blonde Tomorrow

I've been in a rut with my hair the last few years and am totally bored with it. The most change I make is with color (lighter brown in the spring/summer, dark brown or auburn in the fall/winter). So I went to a new sylist yesterday. She does the hair of a girl here in the office and it always looks amazing so I figured "Why not? What do I have to lose?". She was fantastic, spent a long time with me figuring out what I want, what makes me happy, what I haven't liked about past haircuts/color.

So 3 hours later (hello short work day) I walked out of the studio much blonder than I've ever been and somehow I'm kinda liking it.

Another Update on Crime

You guys might not find this as fascinating as I do, so I will just say it gets more and more interesting and possibly sinister as time goes on. If you'd like to know the latest developments, click above.

Buses and the City Girl

I took the bus to RFK Stadium three times in seven days. Two were completely uneventful but the third (actually second in the timeline) had enough crazy for all the busrides I'll take for the rest of my life. I've attached a diagram so as to make the storytelling easier.

Tuesday I was on vacation and ended up meeting everyone at the game. I didn't have a set plan on how I was going to get to the game since I was leaving from home. I figured I would take whatever bus came first. I ran into Christine who was walking home, we stopped and chatted and while we were doing that the 53 came by so I hopped on that, asked for a transfer and took it to the D6 which goes right to the stadium. Other than being late for the game, no drama.

Last night Agie and I left from the office and decided to catch the D6 which stops catty corner from our office. Again, no drama. More on last night in another post.

That leaves us with Friday night. I again was on vacation (I had more than the max number of days you can carry over so I needed to burn a couple) so Courtney and I met up at 15th and U to catch the 96 which goes straight to the stadium. Mistake #1. Never again my friends. I don't know what maelstrom of insanity we got caught in but wow. Our ride started out peaceful enough. We sat in the front of the bus and she filled me in on the happenings I had missed out on in the office and what was going on with a couple former co-workers. A few stops later a number of people were going to get on the bus, among them some elderly ladies, so I suggested we move to the back of the bus so that they wouldn't have to maneuver through the bus and up the few stairs to get a seat. Mistake #2. We sit down and resume our chatting and among the people getting on the bus are three guys who shall henceforth be known as 'Cosby Sweater Guy' (due to the 3/4 length Cosbyesque sweater he had on - odd fashion choice given the shorts and black high tops he chose to pair it with, moving on), '40 Man' (he had a 40 of some type of malt beverage in his paper bag) and 'Gin Guy' (who had a fifth of gin in his paper bag, and it wasn't his first judging by the smell of him). Gin Guy strikes up a conversation with 40 Man about booze and Courtney and I just kinda giggled. At some point a couple got on, Big Mama and Detroit Hat Man and sat in front of the stairs. They would have completely escaped our notice considering we were being amused by Gin Guy alternately passing out and talking to himself except for their argument which escalated from a simple disagreement to a full-blown, slaps flying fight in minutes. It was bad people. Sample things we couldn't help but overhear - all from Detroit Hat Man:

"I love you. I say these things because I love you so much. You're stupid."
"When we get off this bus, I'll show you what I'll do to you. You won't be able to walk"
"I'm drunk and you're high. We should talk about this later."
"Revenge is sweet like p***y." (Sorry, just can't bring myself to even type that word)

At one point he was standing in the aisle yelling at her. He never laid a hand on her. All his abuse was vocal. She, on the other hand, got in quite a few good slaps including one where she grabbed his face and slammed his head into the window. Good times.

Sometime during this altercation 40 Man got off the bus and a nice little lady took his place. Gin Guy perked right up and came over to stand above her, essentially trapping this poor woman in the corner. Despite his best efforts to make a connection with her ("I'm from Africa and I came here to meet women" her reply "Well, you should have gotten off at Union Station. There are plenty there.") she repeatedly let him know that she did not want to have anything to do with him and that she was not available (she's engaged). Two young guys got on and sat between them and that seemed to quell his interest in anything but his empty gin bottle (he had finished it about 10 minutes after he got on the bus). Somewhere in Eastern Market he asked if there were more buses behind the one we were on. We all said yes to get him the hell away from us (enough drama with the fighting couple) and he exited the bus. I looked back and saw him open the gate to someone's yard and go in, presumably to hurl or nap. I didn't watch long enough to find out which option he went with. One down, two to go.

Two stops before the stadium, with Courtney cowering beside me (I continually asked her if she wanted to switch buses, take a cab, etc. to get away from the scary madness but she didn't want to leave the nice lady alone) the fighting couple got off the bus. As soon as they got off the bus they threw down their bags and she rushed him. She was not a small woman. He was not a large man. I turned to the three guys (two young and Cosby) and said "my money's on her - she can take him". They all agreed. The lady sitting by Courtney said "she's pregnant". We all gave the same opinion which was she was too big and jiggly to be pregnant. The woman said "No, she's pregnant. I know her.". Okay, um, if you know her how could you just watch that happen? Although, Big Mama could have taken the lady too so maybe she was wise to stay out of it. Detroit Hat Man ended up hugging Big Mama to him while she beat him around his head until she tired out and they just walked away from each other.

Upon entering the stadium, Courtney and I immediately got margaritas and tried to erase the horrors we had just endured. We watched most of the game and then headed to the concert where we encountered more odd people. Good times. Good times.

When I Hear Music

It makes me dance (that one's for you Mark). It has been a kick ass week for live music. What a great way to spend the week leading up to my birthday! Yay! I like when life likes me :)

Monday I saw Pete Yorn (he's so dreamy) at an instore at Olssonn's in Dupont. He is so incredibly good live, especially in such an intimate setting. Granted, it was stifling hot in the store, but so totally worth it to see him up close and personal. Yum!

Last night after the bus ride from hell (story to follow tomorrow) and the Nats game, Courteney and I headed to 9:30 and caught Ari Hest opening for The Clarks. I have no clue how I know The Clarks, but I love them. They are super fun and even more so live and Ari Hest is cute and talented to boot.

Tonight Melissa and I went to 9:30 to see Mae. Opening bands were good and Mae kicked ass. They were so good. I love shows like that! It was super great to hang with Mel - I haven't seen her forever so it was awesome to catch up with what is going on  with her. There are some friends that when you are with them you don't notice anything around you and she is one of them. I was so out of it I didn't even notice a super cute boy giving me the eye. Okay, chances are good I wouldn't have noticed on a regular day, but I usually catch on before it has to be pointed out to me by the guy doing the hitting. I am completely oblivious to that stuff. Regardless, it was a fun, mellow night.

Scary Senator Clinton

This is just odd. And vaguely disturbing. This bust (no pun intended) is now on display at the Museum of Sex in New York. It is by the same artist who created the sculpture of Britney Spears giving birth on a bearskin rug. I can't make this up - click on the link above for the Brit statue. If I were Hil I'd be a bit perturbed by the wrinkles but the beautiful line of her shoulder makes up for it I guess.

Update on Crime

The story about the man stabbed near my home gets stranger and more intriguing as time passes. Basic details that have trickled out over the past week include:

- He was found inside the home in a second floor bedroom.
- He was stabbed with a knife from the kitchen.
- There were no signs of breaking and entering and so far nothing has been reported missing.
- Two of the three people who live in the house have lawyered up and are not commenting while the third has seemingly cooperated with the police.
- There may have been a fourth (fifth if you count the victim) person present.

Full article above.

A Bit Too Close To Home

I joke about living in the hood realizing that I live in the safest quadrant of the city. Lately there have been a number of assaults in Adams Morgan which is a short walk from my house but nothing in my neighborhood. I'm pretty smart about when and where I walk and generally am not out alone at night after a certain hour. Other than hearing gunshots in my alley and my apartment getting slightly robbed awhile back there hasn't been too much crime in my immediate area. Until last night.

About four blocks from my house (easily a 5 minute walk) a 32 year old man was stabbed to death just before midnight. I'm not one to be too terribly disturbed by this type of thing. I'm a safety girl. I take precautions (as mentioned above) but I may start taking cabs home from 9:30 the next couple concerts.

If I Could Marry A/C I Would

A coworker and I were going to walk home from work last night until I received a call from Agie saying this:

"I am walking outside right now and can't breathe. My throat is dry and my tongue feels as though a layer of dirt is on it. And I've only gone 2 1/2 blocks. Don't walk!"

So I opted for the bus. My coworker had to stick around later than I did so I headed out on my own. Just as I began to appreciate the soft breeze blowing as I stood waiting for the next bus a man who can only be described as creepy and troll-like lit up a cigarette. There is little in this world I find more disgusting than smoking on a Code Red day with temperatures above 100 (the fact that the gas station in our neighborhood allegedly sells mayonnaise by the scoop is up there). He ruined my breeze that bastard and on top of it he kept pacing closer and closer to me. Thankfully a bus came about five minutes later. Unfortunately all the windows were open which meant no a/c. Normally it isn't too bad. You can get a cross breeze going if the bus doesn't have to stop too often. If it does it can get to be an oven inside (see previous story about hellish commute). I got a prime seat by a window and settled in with my pod for the ride home. Just as I began to enjoy the soft breeze blowing in the window the creepy, troll-like smokey man sat right in front of me. The odor that emanated from this man was a combination of not bathing and a stale, burnt cigarette smell. It was nauseating. I couldn't get off that bus fast enough.

This morning's commute (it feels odd to call it that since it's only about a 10-15 minute bus ride) was much more pleasant. The bus was cool and just a bit crowded but not too. I got off at the stop I usually do so I could cut across the park. It's a bit longer but a really lovely way to start the day. The park is so lush and green and the fountain is refreshing. Unfortunately, the fountain was being cleaned and after waiting on the corner for less than a minute sweat was forming on my forehead from just standing in the sun. It was 8:35 am.

Needless to say, I was a bit crabby. And then I saw that practically every bench in the park (it's a full city block - lots of benches) had a homeless person on it probably literally close to dying from the heat. My life is not that bad.

Reason 523 It Is Good To Be A Girl

We don't have to wear long sleeves, pants and ties in 110 degree heat. Thank goodness for skirts and strappy sandals.

When Did My Life Become This?

Not only is it hot as Hell outside but I now find myself trapped in Hell. I've spent the better part of my day researching bunting. "But you love the baseball Plan B" you might be saying. Yeah, not that kind of bunting. I'm having to find 100 yards of 36" bunting to hide a fence for an event we're doing in September. This should be easy, no? No. I am working with people who want to see swatches of each before they make a decision. Seriously.

Song of the Day

There's a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven't Thought of it Yet - Panic! At The Disco

A different song from the same album came on shuffle this morning and reminded me how fun the album is (even with songs like 'The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage') and with the weather outside (hey! by 9 pm it will only feel like 106!) I need all the joy I can find in life.